She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
