My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
