How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
You're a waste of cheezeits
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
