as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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