i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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