yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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