So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
birth control should be required to get into college
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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