I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
