Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
