Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize