I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
