It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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