Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
