I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Randomize
