nut hugger
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize
