Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
