used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize
