i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
well, you know. whores of a feather.
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