so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
