I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
it's like heaven, but drunker
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
