You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
