well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
MIDGETS
????
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
