using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
