So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
