i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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