doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
