And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
