In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
