is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize