i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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