He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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