Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
