She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize