dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Randomize
