It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Randomize
