I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
