she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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