It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
