Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Randomize
