I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
