It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
