apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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