I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
