I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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