So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Randomize
