Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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