It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
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