How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
