ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
