this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
